Lyndale Tap House

The signature item at The Lyndale Tap House is their Pit Beef, which the menu describes as a "Baltimore tradition." Now, I went to college in Baltimore, lived there for about five years, and I've never heard of Pit Beef. I used to eat crabcakes by the ton, and I've cut my fingers more times than I can even remember tearing into some steamed crabs -- all while listening to the music of David Byrne, watching the movies of Barry Levinson and John Waters, and tuning in to every episode of Homicide -- but pit beef? News to me.

Which pisses me off because if the pit beef at Lyndale Tap is even half as "traditional" as they claim, I spent those fives years in Baltimore missing out like a sucker. I can't speak for what you'd find in the city of Baltimore, but the pit beef at Lyndale Tape in Uptown Minneapolis Minnesota is off the hook!

The Lyndale Tape House is located in the building that used to be J.P.'s Bistro, a restaurant that everybody claims was amazing, but I never got around to trying. Why would I go to a place that's right across the street from The Herkimer? I almost never even tried this place, because everytime I'd try, I'd just end up across the street. It actually took me a while to even realize it was a restaurant, because the upstairs houses some chiropractor that has a much bigger sign than this restaurant. They really need to get a bigger sign out from that makes it obvious it's a restaurant. But the sign on the side of the building says "Pit Beef" in big, neon letters, which is what convinced me to finally give it a try. I love beef, cooked in a pit or otherwise.

And, as I said above, the pit beef is awesome. It's... beef... that's cooked in a pit... I guess. It's kind of similar to brisket, though not quite as sweet or as tender, with a really powerful, smokey flavor. The Pit Beef sandwich I got was just the regular, which comes smothered with horseradish sauce and onions. I ordered it rare, which my girlfriend thought was gross and wouldn't eat it, but I thought it was perfect. The fries that accompanied the sandwich were fresh, hand-cut, and fantastic. Already on the table was a house-made hot sauce and malt vinnegar, both of which should already be on every table in the entire world -- even coffee tables.

I'm sure the other food is good too, but I wouldn't know since every time I've gone I've gotten the pit beef, and so has everybody else I'm with. It could be the only thing on the menu and I'd still give the place a rave review.

And since the name is Lyndale Tap House, they'd better have a pretty good selection of taps in the house. I'm happy to say they do, even though I've read many vexing reviews of the place that argue to the contrary. Looking over their menu, I count about 17 beers on tap, which is an especially impressive number considering how they are all very good selections. Also, all of their taps are half price during happy hour. How anybody could complain about a beer selection that offers Rocky's Revenge for three bucks or so is beyond me.

Also, I've always had the same waitress who is very charming and looks just like a young Marisa Tomei. I'm not saying that anybody should go to a restaurant just because one of the waitresses looks like Marisa Tomei, but I am saying that more restaurants should hire waitresses who look like Marisa Tomei. It just seems to make the food taste better.

The highest compliment I can pay Lyndale Tap House is that, even though it's directly across the street from my favorite restaurant, I have still managed to go there on more than one occasion. In fact, I even once meant to go to Herkimer, but actually ended up going to Lyndale Tap. What can I say? It brings me back to my days in Baltimore.