Midtown Mission Part 1: Andy's Garage

Here is the mission I have set for myself: To eat at every restaurant in the Midtown Global Market by the end of Summer/start of fall, or at least until it becomes too cold to bike there from my apartment.

Why? Because I love the Market, but I always tend to visit the same one or two places over and over again, so I wanted to force myself to branch out and try more things, at least for the sake of this blog. It's also the perfect distance for a nice bike ride, and I'd like to force myself to do more of that as well. So... I have begun the Midtown Mission.

Andy's Garage was my first choice to begin my mission, not only because I've heard so many raves about their food, but because I always overlook them when I visit. I always figure I can get a burger and fries anywhere, so why not get something more exotic? Anyway, yesterday I finally gave Andy's a try, and it was pretty good, but not exceptional.

Their menu is quite extensive, with a variety of different burgers and sandwiches, but I just got a cheeseburger and fries, because I don't care what you put on a burger, just cheese and pickles is going to be better. The service was great and very fast, although the wait for the food to come was about ten or fifteen minutes, but that's ok because everything was clearly made to order, and unlike many places in the Market, their seating area doesn't feel overcrowded or right in the middle of a busy hallway. And the space is fun to just look at, since it is a pretty nice facsimile of some greasy spoon diner from the fifties, and somehow manages to be cool without being overly obnoxious, if that makes any sense.

The best part of the burger was the bun, which tasted fresh and had that perfect tenderness that made it soft to the bite, but firm enough to not get soggy when wrapped around a juicy cheeseburger. The burger was perfectly cooked (although they didn't ask me how I wanted it done, so be warned that the default is toward well done, or at least mine was) and very juicy and tasted fresh, but I had to admit it was too salty for my tastes. I choose my words their very diplomatically because, as I said, people rave about this place and it's always crowded, so maybe it's just my tastes or maybe it was just an off day. Either way, I found the salt to be overpower and off-putting, which is a shame because everything else seemed so perfect.

The fries were about as fresh as I'll ever get at any restaurant anywhere, since they literally cut up the potato after I ordered, and the difference was amazing. I've never had fries that fresh or that well cooked. However... they were too salty for my tastes. I hate to say it, but there you go. Too salty for my tastes. I'd definitely go back for those fries, and ordering them with no salt shouldn't be a problem considering how they were a whole potato just five minutes before I placed my order.

So that's Andy's Garage, an almost perfect culinary experience, except for the fact that everything was over-salted for my tastes, but I'll definitely give them another try, and I do recommend you try them as well. I did get a pretty good cheeseburger, fries, and a fountain soda for under ten bucks, which is about as cheap a lunch as you'll get at the market. But ask them to go light on the salt.

The Lowbrow

The Lowbrow has slowly become my favorite restaurant in the Twin Cities. I've been going there almost every week or so for the past couple months, and if I've been remiss in writing up a review it's because I've been too busy eating their food to write about how good it is. Now, you'll notice I haven't said the Lowbrow is the best restaurant in the Twin Cities, nor that they have the best food or the most exceptional service: They simply have great food, good service, and an exceptional atmosphere that all adds up to the place that has become my first choice almost any time I'm hungry or just want to sit and get a beer. And I have no regrets about that.

I usually come to the Lowbrow for happy hour, since it's pretty great. They have a nice selection of (mostly) local taps for three bucks, similarly priced glasses of wine, and half price nachos which are fantastic and plentiful even if you just get the half-sized portion. I also really love their happy hour for another reason: It's just outside of Uptown (where I live), so it's usually not too crowded, it's never full of hipsters, frat boys, drunk girls, or just plain douches (no offense to Uptown! As I said, I live there and I love it... but you know...), and it's also a nice bike ride so I can trick myself into getting nachos and a couple beers and still think I'm getting some exercise.

My usual routine is to go to Comic Book College on Wednesday afternoon when their new stuff comes out, then take whatever I got over to Lowbrow where I read comics, drink a couple of Fulton Sweet Child of Vines, and usually get some nachos. During happy hour (3pm-5pm weekdays) the nachos are about three bucks, which is the price of a beer. You can also add on beef or pork or order a side of guacamole for an extra charge, but they don't need it. The nachos are pretty much perfect as is, and the salsa it comes with is fantastic... but I do sometimes get meat because meat makes everything better. But forget about the guacamole, since it's not that good. It was kind of bland and overly thick for my tastes. I don't know if they make their own guacamole or buy another brand, but it's the only thing I've ever tried here that was unspectacular.

Sometimes I skip the nachos (or just come for dinner) and get a burger. Their menu says they use "100% grass-fed Minnesota beef," and while that's all well and good, all I know is that they taste fantastic and come perfectly cooked. Anybody who has read my reviews of burger joints before knows that I love my burgers medium rare and rant and rave when a restaurant can't seem to cook a burger properly. The Lowbrow doesn't have this problem, and every burger I've ordered has come perfectly cooked every time. It always shocks me how rare it is to be able to get a burger that isn't... well...  medium rare. And this isn't because some restaurants are afraid of food-born illness, it's just because lots of places don't know how to cook a burger to order, or -- and I don't know if this is better or worse -- just don't care. The Lowbrow cares, and that's one of the main reasons I keep coming back. I also really love their buns, which are soft and tasty and seem freshly baked. It also shocks me how many places get fancy with their buns and use breads that are all but impossible to bite into, but I don't want to start off on another rant...

The burger I get most often is The Fire Breather, which is "chili rubbed with chipotle gouda, sauteed jalapenos, and spicy mayo." If that doesn't sound good to you, you're crazy. And if it does sound good to you, it's actually even better than you think. This would be on my list of the five or so best burgers I've ever had. I've had their other burgers as well, and they're all good because the quality is in the meat and the preparation, but the Fire Breather is definitely my favorite.

However, I've been off cheese lately (in my attempt to last the entire month of July without eating any cheese or drinking any milk), so I've been branching out. I could order the Fire Breather without cheese, of course, but what would be the point? It's sort of like this upcoming Jason Bourne movie starring Jeremy Renner in the lead. I'm sure it will be a good movie, but I'll just rewatch the ones with Matt Damon, thank you very much. Anyway, I've also had their pulled pork sandwich a few times, and it's pretty great, but it's not going to replace something you'd get at a local, dedicated BBQ joint. But it's still a darn good sandwich. Even better is their homemade fish sticks, which is basically just their version of fish and chips. Nobody who doesn't live here would believe me when I say this, but Minneapolis has somehow become something of a mecca for amazing fish and chips, and these more than stack up to the best I've had here. They are smaller and more "stick like," but the fish itself is fresh and perfectly cooked, and the batter is very light so you can really taste how good the fish is. They come with a fantastic house-made tartar sauce, and the waiter even brought along a bottle of malt vinegar before I could even ask, which is always a sign that a place means business.

Oh, and everything comes with fries, and if I haven't mentioned that already, it's only because I was saving the best for last. Here's all I'll say: fresh, house-cut, and perfect.

And the place is just cool, with a huge mural on the wall that some people might find garish but I think it's awesome. The colors are all muted earth tones, the wall paper and art is kitschy without being annoying, and the bar is topped with hundreds of laminated baseball cards. There's a nice selection of tables and booths, and even some tables out front on the sidewalk if you're into that sort of thing. I usually go for a booth, but I've sat outside when I was with people who wanted to be outside, and while I prefer a patio to sidewalk seating, the sidewalk is wide enough that it wasn't a problem.

So... that's the Lowbrow. Just go check it out already, and if you come on a Wednesday around 4:00 and see a bearded guy in the corner reading a comic book, come say hi.

B Spot

This might be of interest only to my faithful readers who live in Cleveland, Ohio. I don't live in Cleveland, but my mother does, and when I visited her over this past weekend we went to B Spot, a new burger joint owned by celebrity chef Michael Symon. Symon is a Cleveland native, an Iron Chef, and now world famous chef and restaurateur. I've always liked the guy as a TV personality, and now I can say I like him as a creator of restaurants as well. Damn good burger, even if some things about his restaurant were a little less than perfect.

To begin with, it's one of those restaurants with lots of rules. Anybody who knows me should be well aware that I love rules and always do my best to abide by them, but I also never hesitate to complain about rules that make no sense and serve no purpose. Not allowing reservations is one of those restaurant rules that I find annoying, doubly so when the establishment is like the B Spot and offers nowhere to congregate comfortably while you spend your inevitable wait for your table. Also, they won't seat you until your entire party is there -- which is absolutely logical and reasonable and more than fine, except for when they went ahead and sat us before our fourth party member arrived, and then complained about how we were given a table even though our party wasn't complete.

This is Michael Symon, not me.

We attempted to order appetizers, but were told that the restaurant served no appetizers, just sides, and that all the stuff on the menu that looked like appetizers (like salads, chicken wings, etc) came along with the food. It is the policy of the restaurant that all menu items arrive at the same time. Huh? Who would want chicken wings, a salad, and a burger to arrive in front of them at once? That makes no sense. So we waited to order food until our fourth party member arrived, which clearly annoyed our server, even though it had taken him about ten or fifteen minutes before he even came over to say hello. It's not like we slowed them down, since the service was just slow in general.

However, once the food came, the awkward service and silly rules were forgotten because I proceeded to eat the best burger I've ever had in my life. No joke. I got the Lola, which came topped with bacon, onions, and a fried egg. It was divine. My mother got the Plain Jane, which is just as it sounds, but the couple bites I had showed off how amazing the actual burger was. The meat was fresh and perfectly cooked. Also, I ordered mine rare while she ordered hers medium rare, and mine came rare and hers came medium rare. This may seem like a silly thing to point out, but as a burger lover, I'm always disappointed by how rarely my burgers are actually cooked correctly to order. The guy's at B Spot are doing it right.

So while the ambiance is a little off, the service was a little wacky, and the rules were a little obtuse, B Spot delivered where it mattered: By serving just about the best burgers you'll ever eat. If I lived in Cleveland, I would be there all the time, but I'd get there early and go with my entire party in the same car.

Lyndale Tap House

The signature item at The Lyndale Tap House is their Pit Beef, which the menu describes as a "Baltimore tradition." Now, I went to college in Baltimore, lived there for about five years, and I've never heard of Pit Beef. I used to eat crabcakes by the ton, and I've cut my fingers more times than I can even remember tearing into some steamed crabs -- all while listening to the music of David Byrne, watching the movies of Barry Levinson and John Waters, and tuning in to every episode of Homicide -- but pit beef? News to me.

Which pisses me off because if the pit beef at Lyndale Tap is even half as "traditional" as they claim, I spent those fives years in Baltimore missing out like a sucker. I can't speak for what you'd find in the city of Baltimore, but the pit beef at Lyndale Tape in Uptown Minneapolis Minnesota is off the hook!

The Lyndale Tape House is located in the building that used to be J.P.'s Bistro, a restaurant that everybody claims was amazing, but I never got around to trying. Why would I go to a place that's right across the street from The Herkimer? I almost never even tried this place, because everytime I'd try, I'd just end up across the street. It actually took me a while to even realize it was a restaurant, because the upstairs houses some chiropractor that has a much bigger sign than this restaurant. They really need to get a bigger sign out from that makes it obvious it's a restaurant. But the sign on the side of the building says "Pit Beef" in big, neon letters, which is what convinced me to finally give it a try. I love beef, cooked in a pit or otherwise.

And, as I said above, the pit beef is awesome. It's... beef... that's cooked in a pit... I guess. It's kind of similar to brisket, though not quite as sweet or as tender, with a really powerful, smokey flavor. The Pit Beef sandwich I got was just the regular, which comes smothered with horseradish sauce and onions. I ordered it rare, which my girlfriend thought was gross and wouldn't eat it, but I thought it was perfect. The fries that accompanied the sandwich were fresh, hand-cut, and fantastic. Already on the table was a house-made hot sauce and malt vinnegar, both of which should already be on every table in the entire world -- even coffee tables.

I'm sure the other food is good too, but I wouldn't know since every time I've gone I've gotten the pit beef, and so has everybody else I'm with. It could be the only thing on the menu and I'd still give the place a rave review.

And since the name is Lyndale Tap House, they'd better have a pretty good selection of taps in the house. I'm happy to say they do, even though I've read many vexing reviews of the place that argue to the contrary. Looking over their menu, I count about 17 beers on tap, which is an especially impressive number considering how they are all very good selections. Also, all of their taps are half price during happy hour. How anybody could complain about a beer selection that offers Rocky's Revenge for three bucks or so is beyond me.

Also, I've always had the same waitress who is very charming and looks just like a young Marisa Tomei. I'm not saying that anybody should go to a restaurant just because one of the waitresses looks like Marisa Tomei, but I am saying that more restaurants should hire waitresses who look like Marisa Tomei. It just seems to make the food taste better.

The highest compliment I can pay Lyndale Tap House is that, even though it's directly across the street from my favorite restaurant, I have still managed to go there on more than one occasion. In fact, I even once meant to go to Herkimer, but actually ended up going to Lyndale Tap. What can I say? It brings me back to my days in Baltimore.

Blackbird Cafe

Before I formally start my review of Blackbird Cafe, I have a quick piece of advice for any restaurateurs who may have stumbled upon this website: Always offer reservations in your restaurants.

It's just a courtesy to the customer and it will increase your business because people will feel comfortable going to your restaurant because they'll know they'll actually be seated sometime within the hour. And if you absolutely refuse to take reservations (I'm sure you have your reasons beyond simple contempt for your potential customer base, though I'll never begin to understand what those reasons may be), at least have a waiting area that is comfortable and spacious, and not just a two-foot by two-foot area right in front of the door.

But if you are willing to take the risk on going to Blackbird not knowing if you'll be immediately seated or forced to wait near the door in an area more cramped than a phonebooth while you awkwardly stare at the other diners, silently yelling at them in your head to finish their damn meals already and free up that table, you'll discover a restaurant that is absolutely wonderful in every other way. It's worth taking the risk.

Blackbird is exactly the kind of restaurant most people envision when they think about local, independently-owned restaurants: It's cute, cozy, has a friendly, enthusiastic waitstaff, and an ever-changing menu of interesting, delicious entrees. I've been there a few times and have gotten the same thing every time: The Longhorn, an incredible beef brisket sandwich smothered with caramelized onions, tomatoes, and some kind of horseradish sauce. It's awesome. I've also noshed on the other entrees my girlfriend Shannon ordered, all of which were fantastic as well. The Walleye Po' Boy is another standout, though it's really more of a fish sandwich than a classic "Po' Boy" in the traditional sense, but it's still quite good.

The sandwiches are all reasonably priced, with most of them staying under ten bucks. There are also a lot of entrees that sound fantastic -- including nightly specials -- but they are a lot more pricey, though probably worth it if you're willing to splurge. It's not that I've never been willing to splurge, but that I feel no need to when the Longhorn is so fantastic and so cheap. Also, the sandwiches all come with freshly cut french fries that are some of the best I've had in the Cities.

So, I like Blackbird. In fact, I like Blackbird a lot. It's a fantastic, fun restaurant with great, friendly service and fantastic food. But come on... take reservations already. You can call ahead to put your name on a waiting list, but there's still no guarantee you won't have to wait in that tiny area like a schmuck.

5 out of 5

Burger Jones

Burger Jones opened its doors only two or three months ago, and they're already selling t-shirts at the front register. I'm guessing they were probably selling t-shirts on opening night. Of course, there's nothing wrong with a restaurant that sells memorabilia, but when you start selling memorabilia before memories can even begin to form, it makes it clear you aren't just selling food, you're selling a brand. Again, there's nothing inherently wrong with that, but the food better damn well live up to the hype you're trying to create, and -- at least judging from my first visit tonight -- it definitely does not.

Burger Jones is located in the Calhoun Village Shopping Center, at the end of the mall where Applebee's used to be. All things considered, it's a step up from Applebee's, but honestly not by much. At least Applebee's was cheap. At Burger Jones, most of their burgers run about ten bucks, and that's all you get. If you want fries, you have to shell out 3 bucks for an order, and another dollar for each "dipping sauce." A pet peeve of mine is burger joints that only serve chips, forcing you to pay for an upgrade to french fries. Burger Jones doesn't even give you chips, which makes it all the more insulting when you see how huge the platter is, containing only a burger that could politely be described as "modestly sized." They could've even have thrown in a pickle or even some kind of garnish?

I ate with my girlfriend Shannon and my sister Tanya and we split the "Tower," a big basket of regular fries, waffle fries, and sweet potato fries with your choice of 3 dipping sauces. It was definitely enough for 3 people to share, and at 10 bucks it wasn't that expensive, considering that the fries were hand cut, freshly cooked, and quite delicious. But, still, I'm devout in my belief that fries should come with a burger at no additional cost, especially considering how high the cost already is.

As for the burgers, they were ok but just ok. I might even go so far as to describe them as being "pretty good," but that's about all the praise I can muster. I ordered the Black and Blew Burger, which came topped with black pepper, onions, and blue cheese. Shannon ordered the Green Chili Burger, which came "smothered" in what seemed like a very limited amount of green chili. Tanya got something called a "Hangover Burger," which had a fried egg over the beef patty, and an even more limited amount of hot sauce. All of the burger sound interesting and almost exciting, but they were all missing... something. Upon reflection, I realized that that something was flavor. They simply didn't have much flavor, which was odd considering the abundant variety of toppings on each burger.

My burger was the best, but only because I love blue cheese and that was pretty much all I could taste. The hangover tasted like a fried egg, which the green chili was almost non existent in my bite so all I could taste was a burger that tasted fresh and high quality but ultimately lacking in any real taste. Also, we all ordered our burgers "with a little pink" (in favor of the only other choice offered "no pink"), but they all came decidedly unpink, probably just a few degrees below well done. Not cooking a burger to order is always unacceptable, but at least it's somewhat understandable when a diner offers a vague description like, "medium well." But when the only choices you offer are "some pink" or "no pink," you damn well better get the color right. And they didn't, and not just on one burger, but on all of them. That means it wasn't a fluke but a general lack of competence or consistency on the part of the cooking staff. It couldn't have been a miscommunication, because all of our burgers came labeled "some pink." I hate to harp on this point, but not being able to cook a burger to order is kind of a deal-breaker for any burger enthusiast.

The service was pretty fantastic, however. Our server Eric was friendly, enthusiastic, and attentive. If there was any problem with the service, it was that it was too fast. Our meals came about ten minutes or so after we places our order. I sure don't like having to wait a long time for my meal to arrive, but I also don't want to feel rushed. Getting seated and out the door within 40 minutes made me feel as though our enjoyment of the meal was a lot less important than being able to fill that booth a few dozen more times before closing the door. This complaint is in stark contrast to the horror stories I had heard about excessively long wait times to get a table. We were given a table immediately, and then almost forced our the door at record speed.

Burger Jones is one of those places that just... is. It's there, people eat there, but I can't see it acquiring the same popularity held by the other restaurants owned by the same management company. Salut, Figlio, and the Good Earth (et all) are fantastic restaurants with wonderful food that offer a value for your dollar. Burger Jones feels overpriced and underwhelming. When it was first announced, the owners said it would be the ultimate burger joint, with a long menu of burgers ranging from gourmet to diner-style, but it really has a surprisingly small menu of less than exceptional selections.

Sure, they only opened recently and I probably shouldn't judge them too harshly considering that, but... come on. T-shirts? Call me petty for harping on a point, but I can't help but feel that the time and money spent on manufacturing souvenirs would've been better spent on chefs who don't overcook a bland, tasteless burger patty. Next time I actually have a "jonesing" for a good burger, I'd sooner go to Herkimer, Bulldog, Matt's, the Nook, or a dozen or so other places across the Twin Cities that offer exceptional burgers and actually offer a good value for your money.

2.5 out of 5

Matt's Bar

I finally lost my virginity today.

At least, according to the guy sitting next to us at Matt's Bar. After standing awkwardly in the doorway for a few minutes -- because Matt's is the kind of place where you do that for the first time, because there are no signs telling you what to do and the entire staff ignores you -- some guy told flagged me and my girlfriend down and said there were two stools open at the end of the bar next to him. It turned out his name was John and he was a Matt's regular who had been coming ever since he was a kid. John was a talkative guy who talked to us throughout our meal, and when he found out that I had never been there before, he exclaimed, "We've got a virgin!"

You get the feeling that kind of thing happens all the time at Matt's, ones of those bars that's somehow able to turn dinginess into charm when viewed through the lens of nostalgia. I'm from New England originally and not Minnesota, so to me Matt's is just a dive bar that serves the original Jucy Lucy, a burger with the cheese on the inside instead of on the top. But to people who live here, it is an institution and the Jucy Lucy has somehow achieved almost mythic stature. So of course I had to try it, but the fact that it took me about six years to do so should tell you about how skeptical I was.

I think in order to truly appreciate the Jucy Lucy at Matt's, you need to sit next to John. He warned us about the cheese, gave us advice on how to eat it, and regaled us with stories of the history of both Matt's and the city in general. He talked so much and was so effusively charming, we almost wanted him to -- and I need to put this delicately -- shut the hell up already and leave us alone. But he definitely made us laugh and added to the ambiance of the place.

Then again, sitting next to John only serves to hype the burger up even more. And, as burgers go, there can't be many that have achieved higher acclaim, won more awards, or topped as many "Best of" lists in as many magazines and newspapers. Even if the burger isn't exactly world famous, enough Minnesotans seem to think it is so it amounts to the same thing. Few legends ever live up to the hype. But then again, some do.

A lot of people honestly believe that the Jucy Lucy at Matt's bar lives up to the hype. But I didn't really think so, though I thought it was a very tasty burger for sure. But I wouldn't rank it as the best burger in the Twin Cities, nor even one of the top ten. It was just a pretty good burger with some cheese in the middle instead of on top. It's fun the first time you bite into it and get scalded by hot cheese that pours onto your fingers and down your chin, but it got less fun as I continued to eat. It didn't get less tasty, but it definitely got messy and less appealing. Also, as a person who enjoys a medium rare burger with a nice pink center, a well done burger with a cheesy center doesn't really do it for me. But, again, it's a good burger, and for the price it's worth getting, if not once, maybe even multiple times.

The fries, however, were exceptional, and served in a heaping pile. A half order is also offered, which I'd probably recommend for the people who don't have the appetite of, say, John from Matt's Bar. My girlfriend and I ate maybe half of our order, but not because they weren't good. I wasn't as enthused about the drink offerings, which include 3.2 beer or pop in cans. I'm not going to comment on their choice to have 3.2 beer on tap, but having just cans of soda is a little vexing, considering how long the burgers took to cook. If I'm eating at a restaurant, I want fountain soda with free refills, not cans. It's their right to serve it that way, of course, but it's almost enough of a dealbreaker that I would be more likely to go somewhere else.

At the end of the day, Matt's Bar is a charming place that was a lot of fun but didn't quite live up to the hype. I liked the burger, but I certainly didn't love it, and I'm still confused as to how it achieved a celebrity status that makes it the subject of TV shows and magazine articles. Bottom line: if my friends told me they were going to Matt's for burgers, I'd definitely tag along, order a Jucy Lucy, and have a great time, but I wouldn't choose to go there on my own. But if you do go there, say hit to John for me. He's always on the lookout for some virgins.

3 out of 5

Mickey's Diner

Mickey's Diner is a Twin Cities Institution. Mickey's Diner is on the National Historic Register. Mickey's Diner was seen briefly in such films as Prairie Home Companion, The Mighty Ducks, and Jingle All the Way, and featured in an episode of Rachel Ray's Tasty Travels. Mickey's Diner is the favorite restaurant of former governor and wrestling superstar Jessie "the Body" Ventura.
Oh yeah, and Mickey's Diner really sucks.
It's certainly not without its charm, of course. Dare I say Mickey's may even be the most charming restaurants in the cities. It's a stainless steel, WWII era train car style diner in the heart of St. Paul. As historical landmarks go, it's one of the oldest and most gorgeous restaurants in the city. From a distance anyway. Once you get close enough to see the rust on the steel and the grime in the windows, the charm sort of starts to fade. But don't let that scare you away! If you made it that far you may as well go in and spend an awkward 45 minutes waiting for a seat to open up so you can suffer through really terrible service and attempt to finish a completely inedible meal. But maybe I'm being harsh. After all, it is charming.
"But, Donald!" some of you are probably shouting at your computer screens. "You're completely missing the point of a diner! You don't go there for the food, you go there for the atmosphere!"
To that I say, "shove it!"
I love diners. I've grown up in diners. As much as I love a gourmet meal, I'm a simple man at heart and have always felt more comfortable in a greasy spoon dive than anywhere else. But that's provided the food is at least edible, though decent would be preferable, and actually good would be best of all. Diners are restaurants too, and diner food is good. But Mickey's Diner really sucks.
When I bit into my burger, my heart sank. It was that bad, and not just the taste, but the consistency as well. It wasn't meat. I'm not exaggerating by saying I could get a less processed, meatier burger patty at McDonald's than the one I was served at Mickey's Diner. The two people with whom I ate both got breakfast, which was marginally better than my burger, but nothing really to write home - or anywhere - about. One was a bland, kind of unappealing omelet smothered in chili and the other was a bland fried egg on toast that would've tasted better from my own kitchen. And I'm a mediocre cook. But so is the guy working the griddle at Mickey's Diner. Have I mentioned yet that their food sucks?
I suppose I'd be a little nicer and forgiving had their service been, you know, not lacking in the most basic human decency. I don't know about you, but I don't like to feel as though I'm inconveniencing a wait staff by actually eating in their restaurant. Open hostility isn't great for a patron's digestive system.
But that's just me. Maybe you'll love this place. If you do, they are open 24 hours a day in order to serve your needs. After all, Jessie Ventura wouldn't lie to you.
1 out of 5